No one is perfect.
Not even yourself.

Maybe all these flaws are there just to filter away people that are not deemed to be make a difference in your life - while all the remaining are the special ones who will treasure you for who you are, and see past all your flaws.

I'm starting to get very intolerant of some people, is it normal?
I don't like this feeling.
It makes me feel so judgmental.
I know my own flaws, and I know I am in no position to judge anyone.
Sigh.

Sometimes I'm really disappointed in human nature.

How can anyone be so irresponsible, especially towards his own parents. It's as if they didn't matter at all to him. It really, really disgust me.

Don't you even feel ashamed that I, as a grand daughter, am taking care of them and you just sit back and do nothing? Please, you are so damn useless that you can't even provide them with the basic necessities like food? You are an adult for goodness' sake. Why can't you even take care of them properly? Why does it have to be me (who for one thing, dont even live in the same house as them?!) taking care of them? I really don't understand how you think. Seriously fucked up.

Completely FUMING the other day when I saw how you took care of your father, if what you did was even considered to be 'taking care' of someone. Not buying food for him? Not even bothering to send him to the hospital when he's going there alone to visit your mother? It's not as if you didn't know that he doesn't really know how to go to TTSH on the train by himself? Seriously you don't deserve to be human. When your mother told you she had chest pains, you just totally dismissed her and told her that the heart was on the right side (OHREALLY?!).

I really really dislike this environment that exist in this particular family. Operating on a completely business environment, no love, no care. Where you are only respected because you have the money. Where you are being made used of.

What is this coming to?

The higher your expectations, the harder you'll fall.

Why can't I ever learn from this?

On a side note, the phrase 'momento mori' has been stuck in my head for the whole day.

I dont understand your actions.
I dont know what to do.

sigh, so much uncertainty. bahh

come on.
you can do it.
push on.
even if you are dying of fatigue, you'll still have to push on.
all these is going to come to an end.
soon.

Ah, I smell freedom.
Or not.

After exams, I didnt even have time for myself to go out and do shopping or do my hair or whatsoever. I had to be a tour guide to bring my cousins who came out from Malaysia. So yeh. for one week plus, I was going around Singapore like no other shit. Good god.

Then, horror of all horrors: trainings for IHG started. So I have no time to actually sit down and relax. FML. zzz. And I'm having horrendous sunburns on my face, arms, legs. (oh gosh, ugly tan lines) and and, muscle aches EVERYWHERE. wth is this. that other day I had trainings/ friendly games for the entire day. 9am-1pm: Softball. 2pm-5pm: Volleyball. So crappy, no time to actually eat lunch so I only had bread in the morning and 100 plus in the break. =.= Grah, overly tired that I cant even concentrate in the friendly game for volleyball, it was so bad.

Doesnt help that I have to do all the editing for publications. wtf seriously. hate that useless piece of shit.

I cant wait for the entire IHG season to be over. I'm dying. ):

Looking forward to the NEXT LONG LONG BREAK.
Shall go do my hair later today or tmr. (:
Well, at least I have Glee to keep me company for now. :D

HWAITING.

Am looking forward to all these hardcore mugging ending.
It IS going to end soon.
But before that, mug hard.

HWAITING!

'How are you?'
And you paused, staring blankly at her, not knowing how to reply.
Does she want the truth? Or?
She smiles tentatively at you, waiting for your reply. You continue looking unsure, your uncertainty reflected in her eyes.

Then you smiled, 'I'm fine.'
She relaxes and continues her rants on daily happenings while you pretend to listen attentively.
Secretly, you breathed out a sigh of relief, for she has not found anything amiss.

When was the last time you said 'I'm fine' and truly meant it?

Ah the exams are coming!!! It's freaking scary because I have no idea what the professors expect of us during the exams. Argh.

It feels as though everything just flew past in a blur. Seriously. And semester one is over already.
I'm really sure before I know it, we will all graduate and be thrown out into the working world. The horror! DDD: I dont want to start working!!! It scares me. Holy shit.

But I'm glad to have met all of my friends in uni, new friends, old friends, everyone. It's a whole new experience, daunting initially, but after a while, you settle down and begin to feel comfortable with the people you hang out with. Although I must admit I am still not very comfortable with the speed of academics - how the assignments, quizzes, examinations - they fly in like nobody's business. Argh.

I am seriously looking forward to the dec-jan holidays. I need a break. Sheesh. But I reckon the holiday will be filled with trainings for volleyball, softball and hockey. o.o My year one life is probably the BUSIEST around as compared to the rest of the people. But well, all for the experience! (:
I am looking forward the most to the May-July holidays! DAMN LONG HOLIDAY MAN! :DDD Ahem I'm being too forward looking. :x

SHALL FOCUS ON THE ONCOMING EXAMS NOW. MY EXAM TIMETABLE SUCKS.

14 Dec (Tuesday):
- COM 203 EYE (0900 - 1100)
- COM 204 EYE (1300 - 1500)

15 Dec (Wednesday):
- COM 201 EYE (0900 - 1100)
- HS 809 EYE (1700 - 1900)

20 Dec (Monday):
- EAR 801 EYE (1700 - 1900)

2 papers on one day is just seriously FML. and the worst thing is 14th and 15th is consecutively 2 papers each. Really wont have time to study leh, I NEED TO START MUGGING ALREADY. SHIT.
CANNOT HUG THE BUDDHA'S LEG LAST MINUTE. D:

it really sucks to be just mediocre in everything.
you're never good enough, you're always losing out to people, you're always getting scorned at.